But a comedian has the ability to use their anger and intelligence to refocus and reconstruct their pain into entertainment. [5], Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. 0000001936 00000 n Garbage out. He was regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comics of all time. endobj Oh, and I cant finish without recommending the routine Carlin calls his Incomplete List of Impolite Words. Press J to jump to the feed. I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Your email address will not be published. All rights reserved. That somehow we're gonna put in jeopardy this beautiful little blue-green ball that's just a-floatin' around the sun? Thats right. Very relevant for these times of high public paranoia about Global Warming! Carlin was noted for his black comedy and reflections on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. These people on social media, they're not your friends. endobj Everybody says they suck. 183 21 To avoid redundancy in the comments section, we kindly ask /u/arkreder to respond to this comment with the prompt you used to generate the output in this post, so that others may also try it out. I dont vote. Transcript. I dont vote. Carlin was known for his dark comedy and reflections on politics, religion, psychology, language and taboo subjects. of American cultural paradoxes. endstream Carlin took a liberal stance on most things, but generally found politics and politicians corrupt and ridiculous. Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features. But here's the thing: social media isn't real life. His political commentary was scathing and on par with any of the greats, Pryor, Chappelle, Bruce. Comedian George Carlin, who died Sunday of heart failure at 71, was known for an act featuring "seven dirty words" that became the focus of a Supreme Court case. If you are interested in using one of my images for your website, or if you would like a print, please contact me directly (See the Contact tab). And if we had a list like that, I wouldn't mind that brilliant judge in Alabama displaying it prominently in the courthouse wall. George Carlin. "Forget the politicians. So maybe maybe MAYBE, its not the politicians who suck. And we've only been engaged in heavy industry for a little over two hundred years. But wheres the logic in that? Lee did not involve himself formally in politics, but he was a symbol of diversity and the synthesis of "East" and "West." I have a problem with the Ten Commandments. Nobody cares. It's all just noise. "Save the trees, save the bees, save the whales, save those snails." 0000080920 00000 n George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) Nobody seems to care. Ill let Carlin tell you what he thinks. They come from American parents, American families, American homes, American schools, American churches, American businesses, American universities, and theyre elected by American citizens. He missed this one. Carlin, for 40-years, was one of the greatest comedians ever. Here it is: Why are there ten? Sure, here's a sample transcript of George Carlin talking about social media in one of his stand-up routines: "Let's talk about social media for a minute. Fuck em! They [Catholic teachers] would fall back on, Well, its a mystery.[2]. Its hard to say if he was a Republican or a Democrat, however, as he refused to vote, considering it pointless because voting, as he said, is the illusion of choice.[4]. But, he is wrong here. Reading the text, it sounds like a reasonably serious essaywell, sort of. User Clip: Carlin Mocks Politicians' Language. _S@bZ&j{|pQGB0qw_rm+eUr!:J9d j9mLJRL Q3PUn\#MuRJ\ *B6B6x 0000005590 00000 n Do you? 'Look at me, I'm so happy and successful and loved!' We'll start with the first three, and I'll use the Roman Catholic version because those are the ones I was fed as a little boy. Carlin is funny as hell. He was raised an Irish Catholic, even an alter boy, and attended a Catholic school until the age of 15, when he dropped out of school.[1]. He said: Once you leave the womb, conservatives dont care about you until you reach military age. ), Stay up to date with the latest Digital Ants Network (DAN) versions in our channel, All of these features are available at no cost to you. It's our undeniably superior (almost god-like) intelligence that made life difficult for us when we were children. You have owners. )'B^E_2yKg&. But theres a reason. And the more noise there is, the harder it is to hear anything worth listening to. Regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comedians of all time, he was dubbed "the dean of counterculture comedians". People like to twist that around, I know. All day long beating you over the head with their media telling you what to believe, what to think and what to buy. Isnt it a bit ironic, though, that the audience is laughing at all this when, essentially, Carlin is saying to them, directly to their faces, that they are stupid? `XX /;VU}`M%VO #5Zfb-> But social media is just a symptom of our narcissistic, attention-deficit culture. endobj If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. Whatever happened WellWell he's about to find out! 0000001412 00000 n endobj You have no right to complain. They'll get it all from you sooner or later 'cause they own this f**kin' place. trailer Two reasons. Now you can just hide behind a screen and fire off your misspelled, grammatically incorrect rants to thousands of strangers. 0000002011 00000 n However, most of his bile was reserved for conservatives and Republicans. I dont vote. stream 194 0 obj 187 0 obj Everyone's taking pictures of themselves, all the time. We dont have people like that in this country. Fuck hope!. Schedule . They want your retirement money. Thats what the owners count on. Carlin considered conservatives and Republicans the greedy, warmongering class in political ideologies. In April 2004, he placed second on the Comedy Central list of "Top 10 Comedians of US Audiences".The first of Carlin's 14 stand-up comedy specials for HBO was filmed in 1977. The politicians, the celebrities, and the lawyers, and although their level of insincerity is astonishing, it's still kinda fun to hear them talk. [3], Carlin was equally hard on politics as he was on religion. Vodafone Ad. THINGS ARE MOVING FASTER NOW, MISTAKES WERE MADE. THE FOOD IS GREAT BUT PUBLIC SERVICE IS TERRIBLE. I do not own this video. So my advice is this: put down your phone, go outside, and actually live your life. Michael Cooney was a speechwriter for @, George Carlin: 'Politicians don't actually say things, they INDICATE them', National Press Club - 1999. http://www.ravendevelopers.com/blog/2013/0 Bernie Sanders: 'So the next time you hear me attacked as a socialist, remember this', Georgetown University - 2015, Jimmy Carter: 'The threat is nearly invisible in ordinary ways. And so, with all of this in mind, folks, I offer you my revised list of the Two Commandments: THOU SHALT KEEP THY RELIGION TO THYSELF! Overnight I became a sun-worshipper. Then watch the video. You know what they want? Juno3127 10 years ago You couldn't be more wrong. Good honest hard-working people; white collar, blue collar it doesnt matter what color shirt you have on. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) endobj People post pictures of themselves and their lives, trying to create a narrative that they're happy, successful, and popular. Theres a reason. 0000001596 00000 n ', And let's not forget the humblebrags. He is widely regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comics; one newspaper called Carlin "the dean of counterculture comedians". You know, that thing that's supposed to make us more connected and informed, but really just turns us into a bunch of self-obsessed, attention-seeking, validation-craving zombies. (LAUGHS) And we know this must be true because the next thing we hear from him is: POLITICIAN:I JUST WANNA PUT THIS THING BEHIND ME AND GET ON WITH MY LIFE. And of course, they're all looking for that dopamine hit of getting likes and comments from people who agree with them. Carlin left a wealth of social, political, and religious commentaryand most of it was highly critical. They got you by the balls. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); All photographs on this website (unless otherwise indicated) were created by and are the property of Daniel R. Joder and may not be used for any purpose without permission. You don't. You have no choice. Updated on May 30, 2018. The more we pointed out the foolishness of our "superiors," the more they kept us down. Yeah the public sucks. Good honest hard-working people continue, these are people of modest means, continue to elect these rich cock suckers who dont give a fuck about you.they dont give a fuck about you they dont give a FUCK about you. You enjoy yourselves. 192 0 obj Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts, Use the actual ChatGPT bot (not GPT-3 models) for all your conversational needs, Try out the powerful GPT-3 bot (no jailbreaks required for this one), Generate unique and stunning images using our AI art bot, Chat with the BING Chat bot and see what it can come up with (new and improved! When they're in trouble, their explanations usually begin simply with words like MISS-COMMUNICATION; QUESTION:WHAT DID YOU DO WRONG, SENATOR?POLITICIAN:WELL, IT WAS A MISS-COMMUNICATION. Then share it far and wide with the little green button. Apparently no one has ever claimed that only a small portion of something (LAUGHS) was blown out of proportion. Fuck em. Maybe something else sucks around here like: THE PUBLIC. 4 0 obj Let's get started! Everybody says they suck. You have OWNERS! Maher is a liberal who has endorsed at least the last two Democratic presidential candidates. Sure, here's a possible transcript of George Carlin talking about social media: "Let's talk about social media. Funny, Humor, Beer. Sure, here's a transcript of George Carlin talking about social media: "Social media, huh? They want obedient workers. The planet has been through a lot worse than us. POLITICIAN:HE HASN'T RESPONDED TO MY INITIATIVE. This is an incomplete transcript made by Raven Developers. %PDF-1.3 A person who routinely spends his days torturing the language complains; POLITICIAN:THEY TWISTED MY WORDS. George Carlin: In football, the object is for the quarterback, otherwise known as the field general, to be on target with his aerial assault, riddling the defense by . To learn more, check out our transcription guide or visit our transcribers forum, Comedian George Carlins take on The Ten Commandments. I don't like euphemisms, or euphemistic language. George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 - June 22, 2008) was an American comedian, actor, author, and social critic. It has to be the WHOLE THING. We could see through the hypocracy and illogic of our parents and teachers, but because of our age and size we couldn't do anything about it. But that would be much too direct! Our country is failing because the majority of the people are selfish. His satirical comments and relentless attacking a damaged system that unfairly trounced on the rights of its . But hey, I guess it's just part of my glamorous jet-setting lifestyle.'. Not on some social media platform where everyone's shouting into the void.". Two reasons. We're not rats', Rectorial address, Glasgow University - 1972, For Geoffrey Tozer: 'I have to say we all let him down', by Paul Keating - 2009, for James Baldwin: 'Jimmy. Well, where do people think these politicians come from? And we've all bought into it. This shit they shuffle around every four years? Cause Americans have a lot of trouble dealing with reality. This is what we have to offer. Local elections, special elections, and mid-terms, especially. <>stream Famous Quotes by George Carlin about Politics. So, I have solved this little political dilemma for myself in a very simple way. This legendary rant is even better when read. Everybody complains about politicians. They are us', Address to Parliament following Christchurch massacre - 2019, Dolores Ibrruri: "No Pasarn!, They shall not pass! We haven't learned how to care for one another, we're gonna save the fucking planet? Never mind the press conferences get the big knife out of the drawer. But it's all a facade. Carlin was brought up Irish Catholic but grew into an outspoken atheist. Shut the fuck up! Complete biography of George Carlin . Fuck hope. [FINAL NOTE: If you want to dig deeper into Carlins brilliant mind vis--vis comments on politicians and the doublespeak they are prone to use, check out The Consultation Institutes George Carlin on the language of politics. (BEGIN VIDEO CLIP) GEORGE CARLIN, COMEDIAN: Takes the cake! Marc Allan: Hi. American stand-up comedian George Carlin is notable for his long-standing popularity from the early 60s up until his death in 2008. I just wanna put this behind me and that's an expression we hear a lot these days in all walks of lives. << /Length 5 0 R /Filter /FlateDecode >> But he wasn't always a . I on the other hand, who did not vote, WHO DID NOT VOTE. George Carlin was one of the most well-known and beloved comedians of all time. Here Is What You Support, Stop The Steal! They dont pass through a membrane from some other reality. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. They OWN YOU. they're always PROCEEDING or moving forward. 160 Copy quote. Theyll get it all from you sooner or later cause they own this fucking place! All rights reserved. He pretty much smashed the nail squarely on the head. ,G0p%:::400-: @%L`n((lax@\0eF,q] \ .P+4 d3;P hnN*S fxsH>XDAA#beae:i5rY3h11(31013a_p_&]37CD\&k2N@TD}. Been through earthquakes, volcanoes, plate tectonics, continental drift, solar flares, sun spots, magnetic storms, the magnetic reversal of the poleshundreds of thousands of years of bombardment by comets and asteroids and meteors, worlwide floods, tidal waves, worldwide fires, erosion, cosmic rays, recurring ice agesAnd we think some plastic bags, and some aluminum cans are going to make a difference? And term limits aint gunna do ya any good. It's like a highlight reel of their fake lives. And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shitty jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now theyre coming for your Social Security money. Yeah, right. Another favorite distortion is Public Service. Recorded on November 5, 2005, Beacon Theater, New York City, New York. Everybody complains about politicians. "A transcript of George Carlin talking about Social Media" First Response: First Response Certainly! Watching the video and reading the transcript are, interestingly, two different experiences. They are irrelevant. (But First, Answer Me This). The shit they shuffle around every four years doesnt mean a fuckin thing. They own and control the corporations. I say that where the military is concern the extent of a POLITICIANS insincerity can be measured by how far around the world our soldiers are stationed and whether or not any of them(POLITICIANS) can pronounce it? 189 0 obj The politicians are put there to give you the idea you have freedom of choice. [187 0 R 188 0 R 189 0 R 190 0 R 191 0 R 192 0 R 193 0 R] Let's all tell each other what we're doing every minute of the day. endobj Not affiliated with OpenAI. That's the problem." "Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out." " Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity ." "Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups." Pfft! https://ad.style/. They don't care about the planet. They speak of course with great caution, because they must take care not to actually say anything. Its a big club, and you aint in it! this is my tribute and way of promoting George Carlin's work. If you have selfish, ignorant citizensif you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre gunna get selfish, ignorant leaders. But just as pressure and heat transform coal into diamonds, it's that frustration, social pressure and the heat of anger that transforms us into comedians. Everybody's going to save something now. George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 June 22, 2008) was an American stand-up comedian, actor, author, and social critic. POLITICIAN:WHEN HE RESPONDS TO MY INITIATIVE, I WILL REVIEW HIS RESPONSE, TAKE A POSITION AND MAKE A RECOMMENDATION. They own everything. THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. So, I know that a little later on this year youre gunna have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much [Bill Clinton v. Bob Dole]. It's like they're part of some kind of digital echo chamber. CHALLENGES! He discusses political stance and also societal beliefs on the environment, and the Earth's resilience towards bombardment by pollution. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents()/Rect[72.0 612.5547 302.8926 625.4453]/StructParent 3/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> Carlin is usually spot on. George Carlin: How you doing? 186 0 obj "We're so self-important. I know, they say, they say: well if you dont vote you have no right to complain. The career of comedian George Carlin (1937-2008) spanned five decades, with his first appearance on "The Tonight Show" being in 1962.He was an outspoken, acerbic social critic, and what came out of his mouthcould be shocking or even sometimes vulgar, but often his railings against injustice or stupidity or corruption shone a light on some dark areas as he said things that others would or . And don't even get me started on Twitter. So if you are easily offended dont click the link. Full transcript of George Carlin's "Dumb Americans," excerpted from "Life is Worth Losing, his 13th live comedy stand-up special, performed at the Beacon Theatre in New York City for HBO. And American English is loaded with euphemisms. You voted them in. Two reasons I dont vote. Look, I'm not against technology or communication. And then, maybe, put down your phone and go have an actual conversation with someone. The late George Carlin was a genius with words, a deft dasher of conventional logic, and a master observer (and master-baiter!) That's the problem in this country too many people getting on with their lives. They want obedient workers. We're all becoming like Goldfish, swimming around in our own little bowls, looking at the world through a curved piece of glass. It covers the most famous 'rant' part of the speech. They're your 'likes'. Politicians have traditionally hidden behind three things, the flag, the Bible and children. Everybodys at the mall scratching his ass, picking his nose, taking out his credit card out of a fannie-pack, and buying a pair of sneakers with lights in them. Such as the PROCESS: POLITICIAN:WE HAVE TO MOVE THE PROCESS FORWARD SO WE CAN IMPLEMENT THE PROVISIONS OF THE INITIATIVE IN ORDER TO MEET THESE CHALLENGES. 185 0 obj So let me tell you something. Get listed in the most prominent screenplays collection on the web! The table is tilted folks. A clean place to live. The big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. Dog, Cat, Thinking. Ive read it dozens of times. They're your contacts. So I know that a little later on this year, youre going to have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much. I'VE FAITH IN THE AMERICAN JUDICIAL SYSTEM. Besides, there is nothing wrong with the planet. POLITICIAN:SERVING THE NATION. This is the kind of shit youd expect from an office temp with a bad attitude. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( \n h t t p s : / / d i g i t a l c o m m o n s . The more we pointed out the foolishness of our "superiors," the more they kept us down. If it's a really serious matter, they make a JUDGMENT: POLITICIAN: I HAVEN'T MADE A JUDGMENT ON THAT. This country was bought and sold and paid for a long time ago. He often commented on contemporary political issues in the United States and satirized the excesses of American culture. From people in all walks of life usually the person in question who has committed some unspeakable act. Where you calling from today? Everybody says they suck. And then there's the political posts. But in war times they quickly become, our brave young fighting men and women stationed half way around the world in places whose name's they(POLITICIANS) can't pronounce, wandering if they will ever see their loved ones again. They come from American parents, and American families, American homes, American schools, American churches, American businesses, and American universities. 0000002565 00000 n They dont want people who are smart enough to sit around a kitchen table and think about how badly theyre getting fucked by a system that threw them overboard 30 fucking years ago. e d u / e t d / 4 7 1)/Rect[72.0 131.7406 279.0264 143.4594]/StructParent 6/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED. As a lifelong stand-up comedian, Carlin had a lot of opportunities to speak his mindand religion and politics were two of his favorite subjects. Your vote is what determines the direction this Great Ship America will turn. Not in the abstract they don't. OR: I WAS QUOTED OUT OF CONTEXT. Did you ever think about the arithmetic? We're addicted to the attention, the likes, the validation. They don't pass through a membrane from another reality. It goes WAY beyond his famous Seven Words You Cant Say on Television (also classic). Everyone experiences pain, of course. You and I are not in the big club. As long he included one additional commandment: Genius is the ultimate source of music knowledge, created by scholars like you who share facts and insight about the songs and artists they love. (LAUGHS). ', Defense of 2nd Spanish Republic - 1936, Jimmy Reid: 'A rat race is for rats. They're your followers. George Carlin was an American stand-up comedian, actor, social critic and author. The transcripts I could find always sucked. Everybodys at the mall, scratchin his ass, pickin his nose, takin his credit card out of his fanny pack and buyin a pair of sneakers with lights in them. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( M o n t c l a i r S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y \n D i g i t a l C o m m o n s)/Rect[466.2109 650.625 540.0 669.375]/StructParent 2/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> On Election Day, I stay home. We invite you and ask you to help us update this wiki by editing it. For added emotional impact sons and daughters can always be substituted for men and women and so I think we can sum this up. 188 0 obj If you vote, and you elect dishonest, incompetent people, and they get into office and screw everything up, well you are responsible for what they have done, YOU caused the problem, you voted them in, you have no right to complain. Two reasons I dont vote: first of all, its meaningless. It's so obvious that it almost goes without saying, but comedians are generally more intelligent and sensitive than the average person. War, disease, death, destruction, hunger, filth, poverty, torture, crime, corruption, and the Ice Capades. He and his "seven dirty words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. And there you have it, a transcript of George Carlin's take on social media. Now, in the interest of logicsomething religion has a really hard time withI'm going to skip around the list a little bit: THOU SHALT NOT STEAL. I just wanna put this thing behind me and get on with my life (CLAPS, LAUGHS). Youre just gunna wind up with a brand new bunch of selfish, ignorant Americans [leaders]. Update this biography Besides, environmentalists don't give a shit about the planet. WHEN THE HEARINGS HAVE CONCLUDED, I WILL MAKE A JUDGMENT OR I MIGHT MAKE AN ASSESSMENT. These are the websites where people go to express themselves, right? 0 Two hundred years versus four and a half billion. Its what our system produces. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents(digitalcommons@montclair.edu)/Rect[400.0562 72.3516 527.5898 82.8984]/StructParent 7/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> First of all, I can see the sun, okay? THUS FAR, HE HASN'T RESPONDED. GEORGE CARLIN: I want to tell you something about words that I think is important.